Human-beings

Today I was reflecting on my time in Ethiopia and how it has shaped some of my thinking.
I was thinking about the kind, gentle, hospitable hearts of the Ethiopians. Ethiopia is like many other African countries in that they work as a collectivist culture. That is, they valued the "we" over the "I". It is because of this they often hold relationships over tasks. Their greetings are longer but more intentional. They care for one another and spend a lot of time sitting with a cup of coffee. It may be partly because I was not in a full time job, or life in Ethiopia, but this slower pace of life is something that I find refreshing being in these other cultures. It allows for a change in perspective - of the world, and of yourself. My time was filled with space to just be.

I recently heard Brian Heerwagen share on a podcast that we are human-beings, not human-doings. 

We are meant to get our worth from who we are, not what we do. Of course our actions are important (because they have the potential for good or for evil), but our relationships are even more significant.

It is how we are known.

Likewise, as Christians, it is not what we do but the relationship with the Lord that we have. Again, what we do matters but we cannot lose sight of who we are in Christ.

This thought intersects with the deep realization that we need one another. It is not a new thought. It is something that continually surfaces in my life, but I am finding new pieces of recently. Living in a culture that is more individualistic doesn't cater to natural connection where there is space to just be. There is the pressure to do more, and do better. As I have been living in a more isolated season of life, I am reminded how important close community is. I grieve for those who have not had the richness of loving and being loved. We don't just need each other as helpers and fun play mates, but we need each other, on a spiritual, emotional, visceral level. God designed us for relationship, and for community. That is why at the core of every human there is this desire for connection and belonging. I see it in my friends, I see it in the face of the woman sitting on the street corner, and I see it in the orphans eyes.

Recently Selamta added spiritual development to the core of their model. When talking with some of the leaders of the organization, they told me that they have shifted their questions for the kids from not "what do you want to do when you grow up?", but "who do you want to be?".

What a huge shift in perspective.

I was challenged with this thought of, who do I want to be? Who do I want to know as? Not, what do I want to be known for? My activities and achievements will come and go, but at the end of the day, what remains?

What if this is how we view others, and what we ask of them? Who do you want to be?

So I ask you today, not what are you doing, but who are becoming? What relationships have you invested in and who are you in Christ? Is there enough space in your life to just be? If not, what fears or pressures are preventing you from doing so?

Wenchi Crater Lake

One of my very favorite days in Ethiopia was when we went to hike Wenchi Crater Lake.
We were told we were just going to "walk around a lake", but our day turned out to be far greater than we could have imagined.

First off we drove 4 hours out of the city. After living on the outskirts of a smoggy, bustling city, it was nice to have a change of scenery and some fresh air. We drove through beautiful country side, past small huts, abandoned green houses, slowed for local traffic (donkeys, goats, horses) and through small towns. We stopped at a resort for breakfast, where we were terrorized by toast stealing monkeys but enjoyed powering up with some eggs and macchiatos.

Finally after some more driving (which included having to be dug out of the mud) we made it to the lake. The first site of it took our breath away. Nestled in the middle of some lush mountains was this bright lake. Because our driver said he thought we didn't have enough time, and we were so excited to have arrived, we pretty much ran down the mountain. Along the way we passed huts, and local villages. Donkeys and babies. We stopped every so often to take a photo and then continued on our way.

Finally at the bottom of the mountain we ran to the greenish blue water. Touching our toes in the cold water, we thought: "This is it! We did it! We made it to the lake!".

Little did we know, the adventure had just begun. We were quickly told we could take a boat.


So we took a boat...

...across the lake to a "400 year old monastery". After some time walking around, my friends and I ended up on bench where we shared a moment of prayer together. It was simple, but beautiful moment shared with new friends in an incredible place.

We took the boat back to the other side, and started walking again. What was incredible was that around every turn, the scenery changed. Wooded passage ways led to bamboo groves. Rocky paths turned to green pastures. Green pastures led along side cliffed mountains that opened to Narnia like valleys. Lush hills with goats and horses crazing on them. A 90 year old Orthodox monk (who knew that was a thing?), dressed in tradition clothes and crosses stood and shook our hands.

We passed a water mill.

 

And a small water fall.

Walked along a small stream and ended up in swampy fields of mud.

Mud on mud on mud.

But it's okay, because we washed off in the hot spring.

And finally, I knew that I was not going to be able to make it back up the mountain. I'm going to use the altitude as an excuse (but really, yo' girl is just not in shape).

So I hired a horse.

A scrawny little grey horse.

 

Although they made me still walk some of the steep parts, (and I bitterly started to think I was just paying for their walk home), I rode most of the way up the mountain. And it was so much fun and I was so grateful not to have to walk the whole way. It had been a very long time since I've ridden a horse, so it made me feel young again (am I old enough to say that yet?). 

What made our day so amazing was that it just continued to exceed our expectations. Our walk turned into a boat ride, into a movie set scenery, into a horse ride.

Also, I will say the company was great and everyone had good attitudes the entire way. That doesn't always happen, so I was so thankful for everyone that came along with us.

The damp journey home was long, but Abby, Tess and I sat in the back of the van and just made each other laugh the entire way home. ... well until we hit stand still traffic back in Addis and it took us 2 hours to make it the final (what should be) 15 min home... We finally rolled into home at nearly midnight, having not eaten since we our monkey friends that morning. So hungry, so tired, but so so content.

I'm so grateful for unhindered adventure, and the opportunity to see new pieces of God's creativity and beauty. Never stop exploring friends! 

Selamta Family Project

So I guess it's about time I actually talk about the very place I spent most of my time in.

I shared a bit before about Selamta's model and theory of change. But when you see it in real life, everything changes. These families, integrated so intimately into their neighborhoods, have found the transformational power of love and belonging. At first you would not know the difficult paths these kids walked before they joined these families. It is a testament to the hard work the staff have put in, the incredible love the mothers have given and the support of their surrounding community. It was not, and is not, an easy journey to walk. If you look closer, there are still signs of trauma that have surfaced, and as I spent time with the kids, they opened up a bit about their past...a hard reminder of the reality of pain that is still carried in corners of their heart. But what I saw at Selamta was vastly different to other orphaned and vulnerable children.

Selamta is an in-country, community integrated, family-based solution, with national leadership.
They stand on four cornerstones: Health & Wellness, Psychosocial Support, Education, and Spiritual Development/Life-skills which are all provided through the support of professional staff.
Each one of these things is significant in their success and helps them excel. 

 There are currently 10 forever families in Selamta's program (serving about 90 children). We had the opportunity to have most of our evening meals in one of these homes. They are always incredibly kind and hospitable. In Ethiopian culture, the coffee ceremony is a huge element, and we did not have a home that we went to where they did not make us a delicious cup of coffee. We would play cards with the kids or talk with them about their day. Many of the moms do not know English, but we would try to communicate with them and practice our new Amharic words in between fits of laughter.

Below is a photo of one of my favorite houses to go to: Lucy house. 

 

 

One of the first nights in Ethiopia we went to their house for dinner and I had a conversation with Belaynesh (in the blue, second from left). She was smart, kind and compassionate. I always loved seeing her, and talking to her. We went to their house several times and I later was able to interview her for my research. Her sister (in yellow, third from right) had been in the United States for high school this past year. All month I anticipated her return alongside her family. The day before she arrived, Belaynesh was in the office and started tearing up because she was so excited. I immediately felt tears fall down my face...I was so deeply happy for her. Her dear, dear sister was coming home. The mom is just the sweetest and the first night I was at their house, she made great popcorn. When the people came to pick us up to take us home before the bowl was gone, she sent the bowl with us along our way. I always told Belaynesh that her mom made the best popcorn. The final evening we were having family dinners, I ended up at another home. But on our way back to the community center, we stopped by Lucy house. They were finishing up a bowl of popcorn and they wanted to share with me. Because I had to leave, the mom started filling my raincoat pockets with it. My heart nearly burst.

During my interview with Belaynesh, I heard more of the details about her past. My heart hurts deeply for what she expereinced, but also finds so much joy in where I see her today. In an act of pure compassion, she wants to use the pain she has experienced to help other orphaned children. I am so grateful that she was able to come to Selamta and find love and redemption in her home. She has many hopes and dreams for the future and I am glad to say they are more of a reality because of what she has been provided with at Selamta. And if the children at Selamta are able to use the restoration they have experienced to go into their community and help others find healing, then the impact of Selamta is much bigger than those 10 families. As they continue to grow into leaders in their country, into mothers and fathers who know how to love...the ripple effect is far greater than we can imagine.
This is one of the reasons I believe passionately in in-country solutions. These children will invest directly in their neighborhood and country, that needs the leaders to step up. As Belaynesh wants to counsel orphaned children, or as another girl I interviewed said, "I want to adopt 20 kids, because I have the love to give"...these kids can help heal the wounds of their country.

History in the Making

Somehow in the midst of adventuring and fieldworking, blogging didn't happen.
But I am back in the States with a bit of time to fill in the gaps.

Ethiopia is beautiful. It is full of surprises. It's old and complex. It's broken and striving for hope.

Ethiopia just declared peace with it's neighboring country of Eritrea after 20 years of war. While I was on the ground, the first direct flight from Ethiopia to Eritrea happened, and the Eritrea Prime Minister came to visit Addis. We happened to be in town that day, and it was beautiful to see the flags hanging side by side, banners strewed everywhere, and people wearing ribbons and shirts to celebrate the historic moment. An excited energy in the air. It was powerful to witness a piece of history that was filled with such hope.

But another piece of history that left brokenness is that last year the government (under an old Prime Minister's term) declared there would be no more international adoptions. For a country with 5 million orphans, this was devastating. What a timely moment in history for me to visit Ethiopia, as I, myself have been wrestling with the solution of adoption for the orphan care crisis. As I have prefaced before, adoption is beautiful and I will never tell someone to not adopt...but I also want to encourage people that there are ethical procedures to follow and other solutions that we can be putting our resources towards. But as I talked to the Ethiopians about this decision, they laid out how this decision was not well thought through. It stood on some shaky reasoning with no follow up plan. While it is early to see the long term effects, the immediate impact is that there are thousands of children left hanging in the balance. It leaves me with a lot to process. But many also told me that there were more inter-country adoptions. A US staff member held the perspective that maybe that will force Ethiopia to step up in new ways...to open their eyes to this crisis that is happening in their neighborhoods. Before adoption was seen as the solution, and while it was one of the solutions, it can not, and never should be, the only solution. It will never catch up with the number of kids that need care. Even though I grieve for the gaps that are left in the wake of this decision, I am praying, and hoping that my friends words are true- that Ethiopia, under this new, hope charged, leadership will find ways to rise up to serve their vulnerable children.

History is a funny thing. It is always changing and shaping a legacy and a path for a country. Sometimes certain countries have one moment that will forever be carried with them. Sometimes countries rewrite their story. Ethiopia is extremely poor and has faced many challenges. I won't sugar coat it...it will take a lot for Ethiopia to pick itself up. But I also am not without hope. The people I met, the things I experienced, the stories I heard all have a layer of something more. There is still history to be made, and I will now have a closer eye on how the Lord walks Ethiopia forward.

Inside the Orphanage Walls

Last week I had the unexpected opportunity to visit some government institutions with a mission team we met. I heard they were doing work in some orphanages I asked if I could join for a day. As you may know, the work I am doing is focused on family based alternative orphan care. My heart is to move children away from orphanages and into homes and supportive families – through various avenues. In my studies I have come across many topics on short term missions and visiting orphanages. The need to be careful in the attachments we make with the children and that our actions don’t support “poverty tourism”. As skeptical as it sounds, you also have to go in with the realization that there is so much more below the surface than what you see and that not everything can be taken at face value. … there can be ulterior motives to the information you are given. 

That being said, I was hesitant to go to the orphanages, but knew I needed to see first hand what I was studying the “alternative” form. Ethiopia only has 3 government ran orphanages (all of which I visited), but over 70 privately ran one's in the capital alone. My time spent to the 3 orphanages was eye opening, and yet also so confusing. I left feeling more conflicted about what I believe and the opinions I hold. The situations were not good, in the slightest, yet I found that there were moments where maybe they were providing more than what that child would have otherwise. It puts a fire in my bones to work harder at the things I am called to, but I’m also grieved for the gaps and the children currently caught in the system. It made me reconsider how quickly I was dismissing the work of the orphanage. Yes, these kids too need so much love and care. How can we attend to their needs as they have found themselves in a place that they did not choose or deserve? At this point, I don’t feel comfortable sharing all that I saw and experienced at the orphanages. I don’t feel my words are worthy of expressing it all, and I also want to be careful with what I share about the kids I met and saw. 

I can say, I understand why orphanages are so fundable. Why people feel the burden to go and love the children there. I loved lighting up those girls faces as I blew bubbles, just like the person next to me. But I also carry in the back of my mind the weight of broken attachments as their little eyes look at me and she asks me again, “will you come back?”. What do I say? As I was in a small room with itty bitty babies all staring at the ceiling from their cribs, the smallest screams. I touch his soft arm and my heart is undone. We have to do something. We must do something.

Selam from Ethiopia

I wrote this earlier this week, but just now gotten access to wi-fi. More details on this week to follow:

When I stepped off the plane into Ethiopia at 7am, after almost 20 hours of traveling, I was hit with cold fresh mountain air. I was traveling with another Selamta volunteer and we worked our way through the airport to get our visa, exchange money, and find our bags through the crowd of people. Finally, we got outside where Abby (our volunteer leader) and Habtie (Ethiopian Assistant Director) were waiting for us. Driving through the city was a whirlwind of sights, sounds and smells. Addis Ababa (the capital) has over 3 million people living in it. Ethiopia as a whole has over 100 million people, with 50% of the population under the age 18 years old. 

Habtie and Abby took us to a quiet golf club for breakfast where we eased into Ethiopian life and then finally drove to Selamta, which is on the outskirts of Addis. We spent the day just resting as jetlag hit us so very hard. This weekend has been quieter, which has been nice to slowly adjust to life here. The culture is rich and the language thick. It is unlike any place I have ever been before. Ethiopia is one of the oldest civilizations in the world. They are also one of the poorest countries and considered heavily under developed.  

Saturday we helped a missionary friend organize and decorate the community center common area. Sunday we went into the city where we began the day at a coffee shop with the best macchiato, and then went to church. Afterwards we met up with another team serving here for lunch at a restaurant. After some time to rest we walked the muddy roads to family homes for dinner. I have eaten all sorts of new foods and drank many, many, many cups of coffee. Coffee is deeply integrated into the culture here. Every house or restaurant I have stepped into has served coffee or tea. It comes in small cups that pack a punch. I am loving it. Tea has come in many forms form just black, to spiced (cinnamon, nutmeg, etc) to last night’s cup being season with oregano. Yes, oregano. They also mix coffee and tea in their cups and someone even told me they make peanut butter tea. I have yet to try either of those. 

Ethiopia continually surprises me. Like how they like to sneak hot green peppers into everything. Or how after eating the traditional dish of injera the other night, we received freshly made French fries. And after those, we got popcorn. POPCORN!!!! They love it here. The first night I was here, I stepped out on the balcony and the streets smelt of fresh popcorn. Mid-plate of popcorn, the other team came to get us and I was so sad to leave the popcorn…so naturally, the mom packed up a bowl of it for us to take home. The hospitality here is unsurprisingly warm and kind. 

I’m taking in more than I can process. I have a hundred million questions for Abby always, but am trying to slowly learn and observe. Allowing space and time to adjust and settle. This week I am helping a bit with the summer camp they are having here at the community center to get familiar with the kids and staff, and to just make my presence known and familiar. Soon I will begin more official interviews, and I am so excited to talk to the staff. They are kind, hardworking, and intelligent. I know they hold a lot of wisdom and insight into this unique, complex and beautiful place.